Skinny is just Math.

When I decided to make this change to my life, I was at my absolute heaviest.

I'll be honest about it. There's no sense lying - it just contributes to denial and we all know what denial does; it keeps us fat. Truth is, at over 310lbs (I'm 6' tall), I wasn't healthy. I didn't FEEL healthy. My partner started complaining that I had started to snore, my hips started to hurt and I was tired all the time.
I got sick with the flu - and I never used to get sick. So sick that I quit smoking (yay!) and I haven't smoked in four weeks. I decided that if it was that easy to kick a nicotine addiction, the most addictive substance (so I hear) on the planet, then how hard is it to kick my addiction to food? Well, a bit harder than I thought, but nothing that was unachievable.
So I started thinking about it. Just a little bit. And then, a miraculous thing happened. I woke up one day and I said - I'm SO done. I'm done being fat. Dear god, let the skinny girl out of my fat suit! And that was it.

Most of you who have known me for a long time, have known that I've been a chubby girl through most of my life. Not always straight up FAT, but I've definitely never been bone thin. I don't think I ever will be. I always remember in college, when I thought I was fat. I'd give all the cookies in the world to go back there and slap myself silly. So, I'll do the next best thing. My college weight is my goal. One year is my time frame.

Technically I started this about a week before Hallowe'en. I'm at the two week time frame right now and I'm down to 299. I know that seems like a lot of weight to lose in such a short period of time, and I was a bit concerned as well - but from what I understand its normal to have a short rush of weight loss.

I'm learning a new way of living. New daily routines. How to say no. I'm learning not to eat my feelings anymore, and how to take delight in whole foods. I've detoxed the waste out of my lungs, my organs - the sugar out of my blood. I've had the mood swings, headaches and sleepy spells while my body adjusted to its new life. And guess what? I made it clear through to the other side. I still have my challenges - hell, who doesn't. I'm human but I'm trying and there isn't any damned cookie thats gonna fuck this up for me!

I've given myself 365 days to do it. October 31st is my date. And all I need is math. (Who would have thought!)